I have a neighbor who has a 7th grader and the other night she was telling me that her daughter had spent 3 weeks studying for 2 hours every night. The 2 hours of studying involved her huge backpack with all her books sitting next to her, one pencil on her desk and her huge notebook with all her notes open on the table. After 3 weeks of all that hard work, her daughter’s grades hadn’t changed a bit. Upon further investigation, I found out that for the 2 hours of studying each night, her daughter would listen to lots of music, text her friends a lot and occasionally look down at her homework as if it were going to magically grade itself.
The first thing you have to know is that sitting at a desk with your books open is not studying. Kids do not instinctively know how to study and must be taught in an explicit and intentional manner.
Distractions are not the child’s fault (mostly)
The environment where children study to complete homework is often set up to distract the child from focusing to complete homework. The parent should not attribute the child’s inability to focus to his/her child’s lack of ability to focus. Rather, the parent must create an environment where the child can focus. This means removing distractions from the environment where the child studies. Phones must be removed from the desk. Phones must be removed from the room. Often, it is best for a child to complete homework in a completely different room of the house.
This means that phones must be off of the student’s desk and out of the room in which he or she is studying. Yes, this is an extreme step. And, yes, the research supports it. Studies have found that even a phone that is not being used but is visible to a student can have a negative affect on the student’s ability to focus. Why? Because part of the student’s brain is always on the lookout for the phone to ping. The brain is wired to respond to a phone. It’s like a dog waiting for a wrapper to be crinkled by someone in another room.
The homework routine that actually sticks
One way to look at a homework routine is as the procedures that one goes through to go through homework, consistently.
Decide on a time to do homework and stick to it! 4:30 p.m. for us. In the same chair, at the same table with the same books for homework. Studies have shown that if kids do homework at the same time and place every day, their brains will begin to prepare for homework at that time and place as well. The same is true for the musician who begins to loosen up his fingers before a rehearsal. If kids know what to expect, less friction will occur. Less resistance. That’s what it’s all about! If kids know that every afternoon at 4:30 p.m. they will be doing homework in the same chair, at the same table with the same books, then less reminders will be needed for homework at different times and places. And less conflict! So stick to it! It will pay off in the end.
Consistency is what kills most homework routines. If your child’s intention is to do homework every night at 7:30 and you let them off one night because of soccer practice then that is all it takes for the habit to unravel by Friday.
- Set a specific start time and treat it like an appointment that can’t be rescheduled
- Create a dedicated study spot with decent lighting and minimal visual clutter
- Keep supplies nearby so there’s no excuse to wander off hunting for a pencil
- Build in a short break after 30 to 45 minutes — not before
Goal-setting without the eye roll
Many people harbor a distrust of goal setting with children. The reasons for this are obvious: who wants to create some future oriented, abstract, and seemingly empty resolution that will sit on a dentist’s office wall as some trite motivational poster? But, for better or worse, we have all bought into the cult of goal setting. The trick is to redefine goal setting in ways that are relevant and concrete for your child. Make them short term. Make them count.
Short-term goals are a lot more effective for younger students than long-term goals. It’s not that they can’t imagine improving their grade by the end of the semester, but right now that just doesn’t feel possible. On the other hand, finishing that math worksheet tonight is very possible. So, set short-term goals for your child.
- Ask your child what they need to complete tonight, not this week
- Help them break bigger assignments into smaller chunks spread across several days
- Let them check things off a list — the satisfaction is real and surprisingly motivating
Tracking progress without becoming a surveillance system
Just to remind you, there is a fine line between supporting your child’s academic learning and being their academic supervisor. It is not your job to complete most of your child’s cognitive tasks. These are things that your child should be doing in order to develop and to grow. And for the most part, the things that your child is doing in school are going to stay with them for the rest of their lives.
A big part of creating strong study habits for your child is supporting them in the homework completion process. By creating a regular homework time and space and reviewing the previous night’s homework with your child each week, you can be very supportive of your child’s homework without completing the work for them. Your role in homework time is to review what your child did for homework the night before and to ask them to explain any problems they had and how they think they can do better. This type of support will help your child to become a better learner by developing the skills and habits he or she needs to succeed in school.
(Another note: Children who are constantly monitored by their parents tend to study FOR THE PARENT (i.e. to please them) rather than for their own reasons. This is a problem that will surface at some point in the future.)
While many students can succeed with simple homework support from parents, sometimes students require additional outside help to meet their academic goals. Working with a tutor from a home tutor Union City service, such as burkettutoringinfremont.com, can be very beneficial. This type of tutor can come to the home of the student where he or she does their homework and can help the student in the environment in which they are most familiar. This is especially helpful for a student who has difficulty studying in a school setting, because there is no need for the tutor and student to go through an adjustment period and get to know each other in a new setting. Instead, they can focus on the student’s academic goals right away and work to achieve them.
| Study habit | What it looks like in practice | Common mistake to avoid |
| Consistent schedule | Same time every day, including weekends | Skipping “just this once” |
| Distraction-free space | Phone removed, TV off, door closed | Phone face-down on the desk (still distracting) |
| Daily goal-setting | “Finish chapters 4 and 5 tonight” | Goals that are too vague or sprawling |
| Progress tracking | Weekly review, child-led conversation | Parent doing all the tracking for them |
Most of the above tips and strategies are rather simple to implement. But easy to implement and actually implementing are two different things. Studying and in particular developing good study habits is not easy for kids and teens. It takes a lot of repetition on the part of both parent and child. It takes a lot of patience on the part of both. It takes a lot of consistencies on the part of both. But if you do hang in there with your kid or teen, through all of the resistance that they will exhibit, it will be worth it in the end.
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